Hard Work Is Not Enough

The two most important things to understand about your career are that you must be very good at what you do and you must work incredibly hard. However, good work and long hours are not enough. One woman learned this very early in her career.

• "I got laid off my first job after 15 months. They had hired too many people and when business fell off, they fired two-thirds of my class. It was a rude awakening. I had gotten better performance reviews, but other people were better at promoting themselves, so they were better known."
  
  How do you make sure that your work gets noticed by people? This can be especially difficult if you do not have much access to your boss in one-on-one situations.



• "How well you do in a company is a popularity contest, real and perceived. You need to be your own marketing committee."
  
  The key, of course, is to have people be aware of your work without making it look like you are working too hard on getting noticed. One of the best ways to get noticed is to have your firm’s customers weigh in on your service.



• "If you have good relationships with customers, find a way for them to tell your boss how you are doing."

Chapter continued…

Dating at Work is Dangerous Territory

If you are single when you start at a company, chances are you will date people you meet at work. No one seems to think dating at work is optimal, but several of the senior women we interviewed for this book met their husbands at work, and many more dated people at work. Knowing dating at work is far from ideal, how can people be as professional as possible?

Peer-to-peer dating is commonplace and the most acceptable form of dating, but it still has problems. The important thing is to keep the relationship out of the office as much as possible. Some people recommend not letting anyone know about the relationship, but your company may have policies that your supervisor must be informed.

• "Don’t let the relationship be obvious or you will make others uncomfortable."



• "Two senior people at work have a relationship and you would never know. They are very good at compartmentalizing."
  
  The key concern of people at work appears to be the conversations that go on at home after work. Also, people always assume there is favoritism or teaming up, which is compounded when someone gets promoted.



• "I dated a peer who was a longtime friend, but immediately people’s attitudes changed toward me. They said they could not trust me with anything, since they knew it would get back to him."

Chapter continued…

Is There a Right Time to Have Children?

While some women felt very strongly about when to have children, they did not want to tell others what to do on this emotional and highly personal subject. The women had their first child when their ages ranged from 27 to 42, and at an average age of 31.

• "The right time for having kids is when your head is into it, when it is a priority, and you want to make it work. Your day care will go wrong. You won't have enough money. You will have to make sacrifices. When you are willing to deal with these things, it’s the right time."



• "I don’t think it matters when you have kids. Pregnancy is just a nine-month disruption in a long career."
  
  Some women believe that earlier is better.



• "The longer you wait to have children, the more ingrained you are in life without them."
  
  Others argued that you should not have children too early in a career.



• "I don’t recommend having children between 25 and 35 which are the partnership-making years…"

Chapter continued…